A Day at The Republican National Convention

9.00 am Vice President Cheney (Halliburton Case Study on How to make money in wartime)

10.00am Former Senator Trent Lott (Racism and it's practice)

11.00am Oxycotin break sponsored by Rush Limbaugh

11:15am John Ashcroft (First Amendment What's it good for absolutely nothing.)

12:15 Colin Powell (War Strategy.. We got one... kind of.)

2:00 President Bush Arrives From Golf Course Asks aids for Jack and Water

2:15 President Bush Leaves for Fishing Trip (Due back around 5:00pm)

2:30 John Ashcroft (I lost a race to a dead man / why we need to suspend the up coming election? Because we can..)

2:45 Condi Rice (No one told me.. It always works)

3:00 3:07- Governor of California to read children’s Book to convention floor

3.07- V.P. Dick Cheney (Why you should nominate me for President again)

4:00 Stem Cell research Rap (performed by president's religious advisor and GOD)

4:30 John Ashcroft to Sing Amazing Grace

5:00 President Bush Returns by Fighter pilot. Says we have won the war!

6:00 President Bush (How I will alienate the whole world and bring about the end of times because I like that Mike Cameron Fellow and those cool books)

7:30 President Bush begins drinking Coke and Water then falls down some steps and blames a pretzel

8:30 Former General to speak on the President's distinguished military career